foxinsnow's Diaryland Diary

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things I'm sick of

1. Falling for guys who are either crazy, drug or alcohohol dependent, taken, scared of commitment, scared of me, or who halfway through the relationship decide they're going through some other phase, yeah yeah yeah you get the idea

2. Buying new clothes because I'm losing weight. I know this is as about annoying to hear about as girls who complain abut getting too many guys, and it's not that I'm not thrilled about having lost weight, but why can't my clothes shrink with me?

3. Guys who I just want to fuck or who I don't even want to kiss falling for me. (Scott and i discussed why I might be having this problem. that's a whole other essay.)

4. LIVING WITH MY PARENTS!!!

5. Living in chicago. Although I've decided I'd pick Seattle over New York because a) I prefer the weather, b)i have family who isn't immediate family there (although I have that in New York as well, just not as much so) and c)because I'm sick of pretensious artsiness. (although i am the girl who prides herself on actually knowing what Yoko Ono's artwork is like :) I was considering moving to Boston with my boyfriend when we were dating, but Boston is basically where you move to be only four hours away from New York, and the operative phrase in the former clause was "with my boyfriend when we were dating."

6. The whole marriage conundrum (see my first essay)

7. Not getting laid.

8. the fact that I take eight pills in the morning and three at night (although one is birth control).

9.smoking and knowing i'll probably never quit and will die young and wrinkly. why can't smoking be GOOD for you? That would solve so many of my lying-in-bed-at-night-post-masturbation-staring-at-the-ceiling-worries

10. those friends you can't stand but still keep in touch with (although I did a good job last year about getting rid of a couple of those)

11. caring that it's really weird that I'm both Wiccan and Catholic. My justification is: Mother Mary is a manifesation of the Goddess.

12. Being a bad or at least reluctant driver (although I've gotten better).

13. Not knowing how to change a tire and relying and nice helpful strapping young men to do it for me. Wait a minute...

14. being politically inactive

15. being both impulsive and over-analytical

16. having a woefully small appetite. i mean, i know it's good I'm not scarfing down a quart of ice cream every night, but can't even finish an order of sushi!

17. The fact that i only enjoy shaving my legs in the bath (how often do I wanna take a bath?)

18. still being in love with Michael even though he's dead :(

WEll, if I work out more, I'll eat more, and therefore won't lose anymore weight. Right? i think my guy conundrums are here to stay, including the Michael one. yeah, so, happy new year. and remember; decades don't really start until their fourth year (although the nineties kicked off early with the release of Nevermind.)

love, (although I may actually hate you... what? brain fart),

Elizabeth, The virgin queen (Yeah, yeah I'm neither a queen nor a virgin, shut up!)

7:45 a.m. - 2004-01-01

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